-Well you can't win em all.
Like the drunk guy at the Landings says "The Cat doesn't always catch the Mouse" - "Every once in a while a blind squirrel finds a nut" - "If you always caught fish, they'd call it 'catching' not 'fishing'" - "Even Bush sounds smart sometimes" - "A stacked deck still has two Jokers" - "Even Georgia wins sometimes"
Game Notes -
-All the weapons in the world won't help you without a Defense. We're like France, everyone knows we have 'nukes but no one is afraid.
-The celebration after the first TD- I'm not angry and I don't think it was "classless", I just don't get it. It shouldn't have anything to do with the outcome, If players need this to get fired up to play in the Florida-Georgia game then something else is wrong.
-Garbage
-Jax is still a good time
Despite the loss and the rain, I still had fun this weekend. (unfortunately that has become a reoccurring theme).
-The Landings is an Anomaly
Every year the party at the FloridaGeorgia game moves to the Jacksonville Landings as soon as the sun goes down. For those that have never been, the Landings is a Mall. A lousy Mall, without any decent shops, A sleazy dance club, a food court with five chinese food counters and a Sbarros, and a few restaurants headlined by Hooters. But its got a great location- Waterside, within walking distance of downtown and the game - and a Courtyard, thats the exact size to fit a band, twelve makeshift bars and everyone looking for a party after the game. I'm not sure how this place makes money 363 days a year, but on Friday and Saturday night its the perfect host.
-I need a new backpack - pink just isn't my color
-A Gator Sandwich salute to Daniel for the Jean Shorts
-Boston is the America of America.
With the Sox second pennant, BC #2, Garnett in a Celts Uni, and the Patriots attempting to make the rest of the NFL irrelevant, Boston is on top of the sports world. If you ever wondered why most of the world hates America, well its kinda the same as how you feel about Boston right now. For the past few years, you felt good about the first Patriot Super Bowl and The first Sox title. Kinda like support for the Revolution and the World Wars, but that positive underdog feeling has left you over the past two years. Now you see a Boston led world of sporting dominance on the horizon and you hate everything about the town, to the point that you'd root for China (New York Yankees)or France (Indianapolis Colts) or North Korea (Pheonix Suns) or the Taliban (FSU) to end their run.
Did you miss me?
Monday, October 29, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Friday, October 19, 2007
UF - Kentucky Breakdown
Tryin something new. Normally I don't go too deep into any games, I just write superficial crap that everybody will be talking about. But this post is all UF-Kentucky, every aspect, by the end you'll be really bored, think I'm a moron and ready for a kick-ass football game.
Gator Offense-
the Gator Offesnse has been centered around one guy, and it rides the highs and lows of this one guy every possession. ESPN ran a little stat about players having the highest percentage of plays run through them, and Tebow was like fourth in the country. This list included Texas Tech's QB who throws like 70 times a game, and a couple of option QBs. The fact that we run a semi-conventional offense and still put 70% of the plays in Tebow's hands is amazing. He literally runs a one man play action passing game. and This was working fine until the Ole Miss game, when John Thompson, of all people, figured he'd give up the short yardage passes and stuff the middle, and it worked. It's the formula everyone will run against our speedy receivers and elusive QB, cause it works. Mullen didn't know what hit him in Oxford and ended up running the ole QB draw 20 times to get out alive. Auburn was the same crap and led to this graphic featured on the CBS broadcast. I think we did much better in the LSU game, we ran the ball (we have a running back?) right at their big D-line and had success. I disagree with those that think Moore isn't that good, I think Kestahn Moore has shown a lot of promise this year and had a great game up until that fumble. Hes been fast and elusive (two things he hasn't' been in years past). More Moore would be a welcome thing tomorrow. Meanwhile, we're finally at full strength at receiver now that Bubba is back. But I don't think his return is a cure-all though. He's a great receiver but so are a few other guys on this team, and Im gonna say something that hasn't been said much, I don't think the lack of diversity in the passing game is the receivers fault. I think its' Tebow's fault - What?!?! Tebow at fault?? while I can't confirm this - I'd need to see a game through the coach's camera to tell - He might be locking on his number one option during alot of plays. This isn't awful though, plenty of young qb's do this and he'll get better. But needless to say, I'd like to see the ball spread around a little more than it has been.
Kentucky's Defense
They've been pretty suspect to this point in the season, Giving up nearly 400 yrds/game. They give up tons of yardage on the ground. Both LSU and Arkansas went over 250 yards. But most of all, they're susceptible to the running QB. Flynn had 50 yards running, and Tebow had a breakout game last year, going for 70 yards at 12 yards a carry. Last year, if its any indication , the Gators ran for well over 200 yards on the ground, and D. Wynn had a rare 100 yard rushing day. The secondary on the other hand is only giving up less than 200 a game, with 10 picks - twice what UF has.
Matchup
This one favors UF on paper. On paper Uf's offense is favored against most teams, but the point totals haven't matched the teams potential. The playmakers haven't stepped up lately, with the exception of Tebow. But I think Meyer and Mullen, with the week off, will have a great game plan for the Cats D. With plenty of plays going through Tebow, and hopefully a more noticeable run game, the Gators should walk up and down the field at least a few times. I hope the coaches don't get impatient though (they did vs Auburn). Kentucky is going to allow us to run the ball and make the short yardage throws, but if we get impatient and try to throw it down field too much it could be trouble for the gators. The Gators have shown that they can be rattled in clutch situations lately too, and this is another road game in slightly different weather, with a jacked up crowd. Lets hope they've learned from the last two games and can string together a few plays down the stretch, when it matters.
Kentucky's Offense
Heisman candidate Andre' Woodson has looked great though the first seven games. Hes consistent, spreads the ball around, hard to sack, and a good leader. The knocks on Woodson are few and his lack of scrambling might be his only weakness. He's got a great #1 wideout in Kenan Burton too. The run game looked good against LSU despite being down to the #3 tailback. With those guys still out, we'll get more of Derick Locke tomorrow.
Gator Defense
At this point I'm not sure what the Gators D is good at. With a lot of young talent, the Gators have potential to really good. They are really good... just only on first and second down. I just hope the two losses have matured the young guys and now they know what it takes to finish a game. You have to go a little harder on third and short, and even harder still on Fourth down. They've got the secondary to cover these recievers, and until LSU looked like a good team against the run. The real problem comes in getting pressure on the QB without sending a ton of blitzes. We just haven't done it.
Matchup
So the advantage is there for Woodson. He'll probably get a good amount of time to throw or have a blitzing defender to expose. The UF secondary has showed promise and can cover UKs recievers, but pressure on the QB will be hard to come by. The UK O-line played great against LSU, a team with a much more talented D-line. However, the run should be trouble for Kentucky. The Gators have been good against the run, with the notable exception of LSU... on fourth down. So its up to the UK coaches to find a weakness, and really they shouldn't have too much trouble, I'm just not sure what I'd tell em. This D is still a work in progress. I just hope someone has finally told the UF Defense how to make a turnover, or a tackle short of the marker when its third or fourth down.
Intangibles
-Gators have history on their side. Kentucky hasn't won for two whole decades. Heres a look at recent games. Kentucky has a chip on their shoulder b/c of this though.
-Injuries favor the Gators, we're just getting everyone healthy, meanwhile UK is without its top two tailbacks. The -Home Crowd should be racuous, well as racous as UK gets. Gameday is in town for the first time and this is the biggest game since, well ever, unless you count last week. But This week is different because the fans now have Hope. and Hope is a powerful thing for these hillbillies.
-The turnovers should favor the Cats. The Gators have shown no desire to take the ball away, but not by much, because the Gators aren't to eager to give it up either.
Implications
For Kentucky, a loss would be the end of the ride. Back to reality, for a good but not great team. It funny that a week after the biggest win in program history, they have a shot at, If not topping it, matching it. A win would put them in a good position to make it to Atlanta (but not a guarantee) for a rematch with LSU. For UF, three losses in a row would be devastating. This young team needs to know that it's very close to zero losses, and they need to learn what it takes to win. To finish a game and win on the road. A win and its time to think about Atlanta again. But not for long, we still got UGA and the Cocks. So not much of an upside, the Gators are Just Supposed to win.
Gator Offense-
the Gator Offesnse has been centered around one guy, and it rides the highs and lows of this one guy every possession. ESPN ran a little stat about players having the highest percentage of plays run through them, and Tebow was like fourth in the country. This list included Texas Tech's QB who throws like 70 times a game, and a couple of option QBs. The fact that we run a semi-conventional offense and still put 70% of the plays in Tebow's hands is amazing. He literally runs a one man play action passing game. and This was working fine until the Ole Miss game, when John Thompson, of all people, figured he'd give up the short yardage passes and stuff the middle, and it worked. It's the formula everyone will run against our speedy receivers and elusive QB, cause it works. Mullen didn't know what hit him in Oxford and ended up running the ole QB draw 20 times to get out alive. Auburn was the same crap and led to this graphic featured on the CBS broadcast. I think we did much better in the LSU game, we ran the ball (we have a running back?) right at their big D-line and had success. I disagree with those that think Moore isn't that good, I think Kestahn Moore has shown a lot of promise this year and had a great game up until that fumble. Hes been fast and elusive (two things he hasn't' been in years past). More Moore would be a welcome thing tomorrow. Meanwhile, we're finally at full strength at receiver now that Bubba is back. But I don't think his return is a cure-all though. He's a great receiver but so are a few other guys on this team, and Im gonna say something that hasn't been said much, I don't think the lack of diversity in the passing game is the receivers fault. I think its' Tebow's fault - What?!?! Tebow at fault?? while I can't confirm this - I'd need to see a game through the coach's camera to tell - He might be locking on his number one option during alot of plays. This isn't awful though, plenty of young qb's do this and he'll get better. But needless to say, I'd like to see the ball spread around a little more than it has been.
Kentucky's Defense
They've been pretty suspect to this point in the season, Giving up nearly 400 yrds/game. They give up tons of yardage on the ground. Both LSU and Arkansas went over 250 yards. But most of all, they're susceptible to the running QB. Flynn had 50 yards running, and Tebow had a breakout game last year, going for 70 yards at 12 yards a carry. Last year, if its any indication , the Gators ran for well over 200 yards on the ground, and D. Wynn had a rare 100 yard rushing day. The secondary on the other hand is only giving up less than 200 a game, with 10 picks - twice what UF has.
Matchup
This one favors UF on paper. On paper Uf's offense is favored against most teams, but the point totals haven't matched the teams potential. The playmakers haven't stepped up lately, with the exception of Tebow. But I think Meyer and Mullen, with the week off, will have a great game plan for the Cats D. With plenty of plays going through Tebow, and hopefully a more noticeable run game, the Gators should walk up and down the field at least a few times. I hope the coaches don't get impatient though (they did vs Auburn). Kentucky is going to allow us to run the ball and make the short yardage throws, but if we get impatient and try to throw it down field too much it could be trouble for the gators. The Gators have shown that they can be rattled in clutch situations lately too, and this is another road game in slightly different weather, with a jacked up crowd. Lets hope they've learned from the last two games and can string together a few plays down the stretch, when it matters.
Kentucky's Offense
Heisman candidate Andre' Woodson has looked great though the first seven games. Hes consistent, spreads the ball around, hard to sack, and a good leader. The knocks on Woodson are few and his lack of scrambling might be his only weakness. He's got a great #1 wideout in Kenan Burton too. The run game looked good against LSU despite being down to the #3 tailback. With those guys still out, we'll get more of Derick Locke tomorrow.
Gator Defense
At this point I'm not sure what the Gators D is good at. With a lot of young talent, the Gators have potential to really good. They are really good... just only on first and second down. I just hope the two losses have matured the young guys and now they know what it takes to finish a game. You have to go a little harder on third and short, and even harder still on Fourth down. They've got the secondary to cover these recievers, and until LSU looked like a good team against the run. The real problem comes in getting pressure on the QB without sending a ton of blitzes. We just haven't done it.
Matchup
So the advantage is there for Woodson. He'll probably get a good amount of time to throw or have a blitzing defender to expose. The UF secondary has showed promise and can cover UKs recievers, but pressure on the QB will be hard to come by. The UK O-line played great against LSU, a team with a much more talented D-line. However, the run should be trouble for Kentucky. The Gators have been good against the run, with the notable exception of LSU... on fourth down. So its up to the UK coaches to find a weakness, and really they shouldn't have too much trouble, I'm just not sure what I'd tell em. This D is still a work in progress. I just hope someone has finally told the UF Defense how to make a turnover, or a tackle short of the marker when its third or fourth down.
Intangibles
-Gators have history on their side. Kentucky hasn't won for two whole decades. Heres a look at recent games. Kentucky has a chip on their shoulder b/c of this though.
-Injuries favor the Gators, we're just getting everyone healthy, meanwhile UK is without its top two tailbacks. The -Home Crowd should be racuous, well as racous as UK gets. Gameday is in town for the first time and this is the biggest game since, well ever, unless you count last week. But This week is different because the fans now have Hope. and Hope is a powerful thing for these hillbillies.
-The turnovers should favor the Cats. The Gators have shown no desire to take the ball away, but not by much, because the Gators aren't to eager to give it up either.
Implications
For Kentucky, a loss would be the end of the ride. Back to reality, for a good but not great team. It funny that a week after the biggest win in program history, they have a shot at, If not topping it, matching it. A win would put them in a good position to make it to Atlanta (but not a guarantee) for a rematch with LSU. For UF, three losses in a row would be devastating. This young team needs to know that it's very close to zero losses, and they need to learn what it takes to win. To finish a game and win on the road. A win and its time to think about Atlanta again. But not for long, we still got UGA and the Cocks. So not much of an upside, the Gators are Just Supposed to win.
Hope for The Two Loss Team
I've gone on record as saying a two loss team will play for the title. I've gotten a lot of strange looks and even now some of you are scoffing out loud at your computer screens. Its absurd I know, but here's how real that possibility is. This is the list of teams that must lose before a two loss team is in the game. and For the record, the two loss gold standard will be the highest ranked two loss team, Florida. So Imagine if the Gators win out with wins over Kentucky, South Carolina, UGA, FSU, and LSU(SEC-CG). Any team who with one loss who would look worse than that record doesn't have to lose twice, I'm looking at you Kansas.
Teams that need to Lose:
1Ohio State
2Ohio State
3BC
4BC
5Oklahoma
6LSU
7S. Florida
8S. Carolina
9Oregon
10Kentucky
11W. Virginia
12Cal
13Va Tech
14ASU
15USC
16Kansas
17Missiouri
17 games. With 6 weeks and three championship games left. I know it doesn't look good. Thats three losses per week. Although, three upsets a week is the pace we've been on.
And heres how the number shrinks:
Some losses are unavoidable. Anytime two of these teams play, a loss is guaranteed. So here are the games left with certain losses-
BC vs. VaTech (if VaTech wins, then they'll play again in the ACC-CG, and another loss is guaranteed.)
LSU vs. Kentucky/S. Carolina (SEC - CG)
Kansas vs. Missouri
Oklahoma vs. Kansas/Missouri (B12 -CG)
-Oregon vs. USC
-Oregon vs. ASU
-USC vs. Cal
-ASU vs. Cal
-ASU vs USC
(these five games count as two, because two of four teams are guaranteed to have 2 losses)
Thats 5 losses, which brings our total down to 12. Then you take away one, because there can be one team with one loss, So 11. (IF that team is an undefeated OSU/BC then its only 10). 11 losses in six weeks seems almost easy by this season's standards. And here are some of the games that could be one of the 11:
Ohio St. @Michigan or vs. Wisconsin or vs. Illinios or @Penn State
BC vs FSU or Miami or @ Clemson
Oklahoma @ Texas Tech
LSU vs Auburn or @ Alabama
S. Carolina vs Florida or @ Tennessee or vs Clemson
Kentucky vs Florida or @UGA or vs. Tennessee
Oregon vs. USC or vs ASU
Cal vs. USC or @ ASU
USC @Cal or @ Oregon or @ASU
ASU @ Oregon or vs. Cal or vs. USC
VaTech vs. FSU or Miami
West Virginia @Rutgers or vs. Lousiville or vs Miss St.
South Florida vs. Cincy or vs. Louisville
Missouri vs. Texas Tech @Kstate
Kansas vs. Anyone
Thats about 30 games where the underdog has a shot. So there you go - 11 games, 11 upsets, out of 30 or so good match-ups. And then you can start picturing real BCS meltdown. (Who's two losses are the best?). Also, even if the 2 loss team doesn't make it, you can start imagining Championship match-ups like Ohio State vs. Kansas - we're only 9 losses away from that - Or maybe lame rematches like Oregon vs Cal or South Carolina vs Kentucky - 10 losses away from each of those. Really, any of these 15 teams could be in against any one of the other 15. West Virginia vs. Arizona State ..... Oregon vs. Missouri .... VaTech vs. LSU .... BC vs. Kentucky - All just Ten Games (or less) away.
As I see it, the teams with the best shot at surviving are as follows:
Oklahoma
Oregon
Cal
LSU
Ohio State
BC
W. Virginia
Good luck to everyone. This season is truly a 13 week playoff. Double elimination playoff... maybe. maybe Triple elimination?
Can someone look up if any two loss team has ever won a title? My guess is one of those phony Bama titles had two losses, or its something Notre Dame did before WWII that they still brag about.
just wanted to get this out there before this weekend, I'm calling it 6 weeks in advance! I want credit when it happens dang it
Teams that need to Lose:
1Ohio State
2Ohio State
3BC
4BC
5Oklahoma
6LSU
7S. Florida
8S. Carolina
9Oregon
10Kentucky
11W. Virginia
12Cal
13Va Tech
14ASU
15USC
16Kansas
17Missiouri
17 games. With 6 weeks and three championship games left. I know it doesn't look good. Thats three losses per week. Although, three upsets a week is the pace we've been on.
And heres how the number shrinks:
Some losses are unavoidable. Anytime two of these teams play, a loss is guaranteed. So here are the games left with certain losses-
BC vs. VaTech (if VaTech wins, then they'll play again in the ACC-CG, and another loss is guaranteed.)
LSU vs. Kentucky/S. Carolina (SEC - CG)
Kansas vs. Missouri
Oklahoma vs. Kansas/Missouri (B12 -CG)
-Oregon vs. USC
-Oregon vs. ASU
-USC vs. Cal
-ASU vs. Cal
-ASU vs USC
(these five games count as two, because two of four teams are guaranteed to have 2 losses)
Thats 5 losses, which brings our total down to 12. Then you take away one, because there can be one team with one loss, So 11. (IF that team is an undefeated OSU/BC then its only 10). 11 losses in six weeks seems almost easy by this season's standards. And here are some of the games that could be one of the 11:
Ohio St. @Michigan or vs. Wisconsin or vs. Illinios or @Penn State
BC vs FSU or Miami or @ Clemson
Oklahoma @ Texas Tech
LSU vs Auburn or @ Alabama
S. Carolina vs Florida or @ Tennessee or vs Clemson
Kentucky vs Florida or @UGA or vs. Tennessee
Oregon vs. USC or vs ASU
Cal vs. USC or @ ASU
USC @Cal or @ Oregon or @ASU
ASU @ Oregon or vs. Cal or vs. USC
VaTech vs. FSU or Miami
West Virginia @Rutgers or vs. Lousiville or vs Miss St.
South Florida vs. Cincy or vs. Louisville
Missouri vs. Texas Tech @Kstate
Kansas vs. Anyone
Thats about 30 games where the underdog has a shot. So there you go - 11 games, 11 upsets, out of 30 or so good match-ups. And then you can start picturing real BCS meltdown. (Who's two losses are the best?). Also, even if the 2 loss team doesn't make it, you can start imagining Championship match-ups like Ohio State vs. Kansas - we're only 9 losses away from that - Or maybe lame rematches like Oregon vs Cal or South Carolina vs Kentucky - 10 losses away from each of those. Really, any of these 15 teams could be in against any one of the other 15. West Virginia vs. Arizona State ..... Oregon vs. Missouri .... VaTech vs. LSU .... BC vs. Kentucky - All just Ten Games (or less) away.
As I see it, the teams with the best shot at surviving are as follows:
Oklahoma
Oregon
Cal
LSU
Ohio State
BC
W. Virginia
Good luck to everyone. This season is truly a 13 week playoff. Double elimination playoff... maybe. maybe Triple elimination?
Can someone look up if any two loss team has ever won a title? My guess is one of those phony Bama titles had two losses, or its something Notre Dame did before WWII that they still brag about.
just wanted to get this out there before this weekend, I'm calling it 6 weeks in advance! I want credit when it happens dang it
South Florida Notes
We all knew. Deep down, or maybe even right under the surface, but somewhere, we all knew they weren't one of the two best teams in the country. We just hoped they could take us for a wild ride, and they did. Right up until just before halftime.
The Bulls are a good team, better than Rutgers even, but they made too many mistakes on offense and didn't adjust to the Rutger Defense. The Knights sent blitzes repeatedly the second half, and USF never adjusted and got Grothe out of the pocket, or hit quick slants to slow the oncoming Linebackers. And also this:
Here is the sequence: Just before Half. USF blocks fieldgoal. Fumbles it forward , recovers scores TD. Review. Penalty. No TD. USF stalls drive. Misses fieldgoal. Rutgers drives with under two minutes. Makes Field Goal. 10 Point swing.
While you can blame USF for not scoring and not stopping Rutgers, the penalty called is such a sham, a mockery, a shamackery. I hate this lame "No fumbling it forward rule" Why the hell cant' you fumble it forward? You don't have possession, Its a live ball, Rutgers can pick it up and run with it. So whats the problem? Also, It didn't look all that intentional. I know it happened twice, but the second one was clearly a good tackle popping it loose. But seriouly, why can't you fumble it forward in that situation? I know you can't intentionally if you have possesion, cause thats like a pass, but a slap at a live ball? Why NOT?
Also, this is irrelevant, but did you see the muffed punt? Why is that play whistled Dead? Let the fat lineman score, Its his only chance.
Anyway, Thanks USF, it was fun while it lasted
Also check out this article Travis sent Me. It details the lunacy that is Gator Boosters.
The Bulls are a good team, better than Rutgers even, but they made too many mistakes on offense and didn't adjust to the Rutger Defense. The Knights sent blitzes repeatedly the second half, and USF never adjusted and got Grothe out of the pocket, or hit quick slants to slow the oncoming Linebackers. And also this:
Here is the sequence: Just before Half. USF blocks fieldgoal. Fumbles it forward , recovers scores TD. Review. Penalty. No TD. USF stalls drive. Misses fieldgoal. Rutgers drives with under two minutes. Makes Field Goal. 10 Point swing.
While you can blame USF for not scoring and not stopping Rutgers, the penalty called is such a sham, a mockery, a shamackery. I hate this lame "No fumbling it forward rule" Why the hell cant' you fumble it forward? You don't have possession, Its a live ball, Rutgers can pick it up and run with it. So whats the problem? Also, It didn't look all that intentional. I know it happened twice, but the second one was clearly a good tackle popping it loose. But seriouly, why can't you fumble it forward in that situation? I know you can't intentionally if you have possesion, cause thats like a pass, but a slap at a live ball? Why NOT?
Also, this is irrelevant, but did you see the muffed punt? Why is that play whistled Dead? Let the fat lineman score, Its his only chance.
Anyway, Thanks USF, it was fun while it lasted
Also check out this article Travis sent Me. It details the lunacy that is Gator Boosters.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Games of the Week: Bullshype Week
Well I'm officially out of the prediction business. I'm .500 this year, and that includes predicting thing like Oklahoma over Tulsa, So really I just suck. I can't imagine anyone being any better though. There is just no way to see logic in this college football season. I normally love the unpredictability, but its out of control, way too chaotic, I can't make sense of anything. So no more predictions, they're worthless. I'll just tell you who I "want" to win. Thats usually my prediction anyway.
2South Florida @ Rutgers 7:30 Thursday (ESPN)
Game of the Day - (almost game of the week)
Tonite, the Bulls face their toughest remaining opponent. (of course, after this game the toughest remaining will be @ Uconn, then Cincy, then Louisville, so whatever) Rutgers is a well coached team that beat USF in the final seconds last year. Look for a close game, where the Bulls will have to protect the ball and win the turnover margin to get the W. Tonites forecast: Scattered showers, 65.... (where is the Degree button on this keyboard?) Not too bad for the Bulls. I'd like to say the Bulls know how to win on the road cause they beat Auburn, but anybody who watched that game knows that what USF did is not the conventional way to put away a team. But, This is a team on the rise, a team thats received a ton of hype the last few days, a team that should be ranked #1, a team with a badass QB, a team with a great coach, and a team I hope can continue to ride this wave. GO USF
21Tennesee @ Alabama 12:30 (LF)
The redneck bowl. Foxworthy would be proud.
This marks the third time this year that I'll be rooting for the Tide. Thats an unusually high number for a team with a coach I can't stand. For years my dad and I have said we kinda root for Bama whenever they aren't playing the Gators. I think this is a product of they're schedule more than anything. They rarely play the Gators and are constantly playing teams I hate and wish specific harm on. Well now we're at a crossroads with this Saban thing, I'm not sure what to do, but if I'd have to choose, then I pick Saban over that Fatass any day. Also I think this "Saban hate" thing is really overblown. I mean he left LSU for the pros after the title -nothing wrong there - And then he got sick of Miami after two years. Two Years?!?! I get sick of Miami after two days. He should be proud of himself for sticking it out. Roll Tide.
Miami @ FSU 3:30 (ABC)
I almost didn't even write this one down. It'd be a real accomplishment If you can sit through the whole game without gagging. I guarantee the ugliest game on Television. You know what I miss though, Since they moved this game to the middle of the season instead of the first week, I miss the guys on espn talking about how this game has national title implications. It was always good for a few laughs, then they'd play this ugly game of bad football, and the pundits would talk about what a defensive struggle it was. I miss that. Go to hell
15Florida @ 7Kentucky 3:30 (CBS)
Game of the Week
Let hope the coaches have a better gameplan than this. (this would have been funnier before LSU, when we had two straight games of the Tebow/Harvin Offense)
The Gators are coming off a bye week and Kentucky is coming off a Sloberknocker with LSU. Advantage UF.
The Gators are led by a Heisman candidate Sophmore QB, the Cats have a Heisman candidate Senior QB - Advantage UK.
Kentucky is banged up and missing their starting tailback, UF is just getting everyone healthy including #2 wideout Caldwell - Advantage UF.
UK beat LSU, UF didn't - Advantage UK.
UF won back to back basketball titles last year, UK did it in 1948 - Advantage UF.
The weather on Saturday is clear skies with temps in the low 70's - Advantage people in the stands.
UF has won the last 20 games agiainst UK, UK has lost those 20 games - Advantage UF.
We could go back and forth all day - but like I said, predictions are worthless, This is the best game of the day - Tune in, I guantee fireworks. GO Gators
17Auburn @ 4LSU 9:00 (ESPN)
Imagine this: After two weeks of close, physical games, LSU lets down their guard and Auburn wins in Baton Rouge, and takes the drivers seat in the SEC West with only UGA and Bama left on the schedule. Stranger things have happened, just about every weekend this year. Go Auburn
2South Florida @ Rutgers 7:30 Thursday (ESPN)
Game of the Day - (almost game of the week)
Tonite, the Bulls face their toughest remaining opponent. (of course, after this game the toughest remaining will be @ Uconn, then Cincy, then Louisville, so whatever) Rutgers is a well coached team that beat USF in the final seconds last year. Look for a close game, where the Bulls will have to protect the ball and win the turnover margin to get the W. Tonites forecast: Scattered showers, 65.... (where is the Degree button on this keyboard?) Not too bad for the Bulls. I'd like to say the Bulls know how to win on the road cause they beat Auburn, but anybody who watched that game knows that what USF did is not the conventional way to put away a team. But, This is a team on the rise, a team thats received a ton of hype the last few days, a team that should be ranked #1, a team with a badass QB, a team with a great coach, and a team I hope can continue to ride this wave. GO USF
21Tennesee @ Alabama 12:30 (LF)
The redneck bowl. Foxworthy would be proud.
This marks the third time this year that I'll be rooting for the Tide. Thats an unusually high number for a team with a coach I can't stand. For years my dad and I have said we kinda root for Bama whenever they aren't playing the Gators. I think this is a product of they're schedule more than anything. They rarely play the Gators and are constantly playing teams I hate and wish specific harm on. Well now we're at a crossroads with this Saban thing, I'm not sure what to do, but if I'd have to choose, then I pick Saban over that Fatass any day. Also I think this "Saban hate" thing is really overblown. I mean he left LSU for the pros after the title -nothing wrong there - And then he got sick of Miami after two years. Two Years?!?! I get sick of Miami after two days. He should be proud of himself for sticking it out. Roll Tide.
Miami @ FSU 3:30 (ABC)
I almost didn't even write this one down. It'd be a real accomplishment If you can sit through the whole game without gagging. I guarantee the ugliest game on Television. You know what I miss though, Since they moved this game to the middle of the season instead of the first week, I miss the guys on espn talking about how this game has national title implications. It was always good for a few laughs, then they'd play this ugly game of bad football, and the pundits would talk about what a defensive struggle it was. I miss that. Go to hell
15Florida @ 7Kentucky 3:30 (CBS)
Game of the Week
Let hope the coaches have a better gameplan than this. (this would have been funnier before LSU, when we had two straight games of the Tebow/Harvin Offense)The Gators are coming off a bye week and Kentucky is coming off a Sloberknocker with LSU. Advantage UF.
The Gators are led by a Heisman candidate Sophmore QB, the Cats have a Heisman candidate Senior QB - Advantage UK.
Kentucky is banged up and missing their starting tailback, UF is just getting everyone healthy including #2 wideout Caldwell - Advantage UF.
UK beat LSU, UF didn't - Advantage UK.
UF won back to back basketball titles last year, UK did it in 1948 - Advantage UF.
The weather on Saturday is clear skies with temps in the low 70's - Advantage people in the stands.
UF has won the last 20 games agiainst UK, UK has lost those 20 games - Advantage UF.
We could go back and forth all day - but like I said, predictions are worthless, This is the best game of the day - Tune in, I guantee fireworks. GO Gators
17Auburn @ 4LSU 9:00 (ESPN)
Imagine this: After two weeks of close, physical games, LSU lets down their guard and Auburn wins in Baton Rouge, and takes the drivers seat in the SEC West with only UGA and Bama left on the schedule. Stranger things have happened, just about every weekend this year. Go Auburn
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
YouTube Wednesday
Phantom Pooper - You'll never catch him
Dane Cook might be the phantom pooper
Notre Dame sucks
Notre Dame fans suck
Notre Dame coaches suck (at Dancing)
Also: Justin Timberlake shotguns a beer at Lambeau
Dane Cook might be the phantom pooper
Notre Dame sucks
Notre Dame fans suck
Notre Dame coaches suck (at Dancing)
Also: Justin Timberlake shotguns a beer at Lambeau
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Monday Fallout - Trainwreck Week
Body Count:
LSU, Cal, Missouri, Cincinatti, Illinois, Wisconsin, FSU
also recieving votes: UConn, Miami
LSU Kentucky - This was the Best game of the year. The #1 team loses in a triple overtime seesaw battle. If your looking for a reason why, I haven't found many. LSU had a little hangover from last week - the TD before half, the lethargic D-line. But for the most part Kentucky looked awesome and took LSU's best shots and came out on top. Give the UK coaches a lot of credit, the offense kept LSU off balance with a ton of runs up the middle, a solid O-line, and Andre' Woodson. Woodson is the new Heisman front runner , which makes next week's game a Heisman Showdown(this years winner vs. Next years). So whats a Gator to think of this...
What this means for Gators:
I don't really know. We have to go to Lexington and do what the #1 team couldn't. Thank goodness we've had a week to prepare, and maybe UK will suffer the same or an even worse hangover than LSU had. Fact is They're Good, there's no denying it now. My words from two days ago go nicely with a side of asparagus and light sauvignon blanc. We can forget that game in Columbia right now, cause this one is just as tough. Using the transitive win/loss theory, and the fact that Vegas gives a 3 point edge to the home team, then:
LSU28 - UF24 =means LSU=UF+1 and LSU40(could have scored FG) - UK43 means LSU=UK then UK=UF+1 and thats not good.
but if home field is worth 5 then LSU=UF-1 and LSU=UK+1 then UF=UK +2
So UK>LSU>UF>UK makes no sense,
but this does - LSU>S.Caro.>UK>LSU
And all that means LSU=UK=S.Caro.=(hopefully)UF
Understand?
Cal blows it - Just when the #1 ranking was in sight they go and do the dumbest thing possible. Where to begin with the stupidity? The poor QB not throwing it away - Not saving a TimeOut - Starting this Freshman QB, when Longshore is walk the sidelines on his "hurt" ankle - DeSean Jackson's primadonna "ow I'm hurt" while we're losing and "I haven't made any big plays" Act. Whatever. They are still in it, cause everyone is gonna lose.
Oregon State may be my new favorite "other" team. The last few years they've knocked off Cal, USC, Cal, and Notre Dame . They'll never play the Gators. They're the Beavers. Whats not to Love?
Ohio State? Really? can someone please start a campaign to get USF the #1 ranking. Why is OSU any better? really, why? A win @ Washington? is that impressive? the rest of their wins are as follows: Kent State, Akron, Youngstown State, Northwestern, Minnesota, Purdue. That qualifies as a #1 team? That sounds like a resume for the Emerald city Bowl. The only teams on that list better than UCF are Purdue and Washington. and UCF just lost by 52 points to USF. Lucky for us, OSU has to finish the season against the five best teams in the Big Ten: Mich st., Penn State, Wisconsin, Illinois, Michigan. However, its unlucky that all five of those teams have horrible problems and aren't very good. So heres my new #1:
USF is #1 - Heres my case: They're undefeated, a true accomplishment this season. They have two quality wins - @Auburn and vs. West Virginia. And... well... look who they're up against. The only other teams with a claim this week are OSU and BC. I've already covered OSU's lame resume, and BC's isn't any better. They've beaten Wake Forest and GaTech.... and.. yeah, thats it. Also they struggled with a D-1AA school in Umass and gave up 14 points to ND. USF also has the best shot at finishing Undefeated. Games left: @Rutgers, @Uconn, Cincy, and Louisville. When will they lose? (I know, I know, everyone will lose)
All One Losses - What this means is no one will be Undefeated. NO ONE. This will be the story for the next couple of weeks. All about how this will create udder chaos and arguing over who the two best one loss teams will be. But really, this nearly happens every year. Just last year, we were one OSU loss from it happening. One loss teams almost always have a shot at the title. So we should be fine, two one loss teams will emerge and we'll all be happy, Unless...
Just One One-loser, and many Two-losers -
Unless, they're aren't any ONE loss teams left. At this rate, only two or three teams will be left with One loss, so maybe there won't be an argument (ha) Or what I'm getting at, maybe a two loss team is the second best team at the end of it? Crazy you say? Look at this:
Heres what the top ten should look like on Monday:
1USF - Best 6-0 team thus far
2OSU - worst 6-0 opponents, worse than Kansas
3BC - somehow still undefeated, see ya in Blacksburg
4OU - back on track
5Oregon - looking very good
6LSU - one close hangover loss
7S. Carolina - only loss in Death Valley
8Kentucky - Great this week, not so much last week
9W. Virginia - Best looking Loss, but no quality wins
10VaTech - Looking better every week, only L @LSU
11Arizona State - not sure why no respect?
12Cal - Dumbest Loss of year
13USC - Worst looking one loss team
and then at #14 sit our fist 2 loss team - UF
15 Kansas -still not buying 6-0
By the end of the year these have to happen- Cal/USC/Oregon/ASU play five times=five losses. VaTech/BC play once, and then the ACC championship, so maybe twice. Kentuck/S. Carolina will have to play LSU in Atlanta and both have to play the Gators. OU has to play 6 more games, including their championship.
These Probably will happen: USF falls to Rutgers/Cincy/Louisville. Only one of Cal/USC/Oregon/ASU gets away with One loss. All SEC East teams have two losses.
Heres the likelyhood of every team finishing with two losses:
SEC - LSU with one loss plays a two loss team that Did beat them or nearly beat them on the road. LSU loses: 65% chance of happening
PAC-10 - the foursome (ASU/Cal/USC/Oregon) plays five games against each other. ASU/USC have 3 games each, so no way for them. Cal/Oregon will have to go 2-0 against USC/ASU. All have two losses: 50% chance of happening
Big East: USF and W. Virginia lose. Games vs. Rutgers/Cincy/Louisville remain for both: 75%
Big 12: OU loses again. anytime: 70% - maybe 80% this year
ACC: VaTech plays BC twice and one other upset leads to both having 2 losses: 99%
Big Ten: OSU loses twice vs. 5 teams that are better than any they've faced thusfar: 50%
None of that is ridiculous to believe in a normal year, and none of it would even be a "huge" upset like we've seen so many times this year. At his point the most unlikely thing to happen is OSU lose twice and the PAC-10 foursome all lose twice (even though there are still 5 losses guaranteed to happen to them). And if one of those scenarios doesn't play out, it doesn't matter, because two of them have to not play out for there to be a clear cut #1vs#2. So what if it all happens? What then? We'll be left with a group of two loss teams and maybe one One loss team and then it will become impossible to pick out the two. and Don't forget Hawaii either, who actually has the best shot at undefeated. The computers will put them ahead of a two loss team, despite not winning any credible games.
This scenario is the chaos that has to finish this chaotic season.
LSU, Cal, Missouri, Cincinatti, Illinois, Wisconsin, FSU
also recieving votes: UConn, Miami
LSU Kentucky - This was the Best game of the year. The #1 team loses in a triple overtime seesaw battle. If your looking for a reason why, I haven't found many. LSU had a little hangover from last week - the TD before half, the lethargic D-line. But for the most part Kentucky looked awesome and took LSU's best shots and came out on top. Give the UK coaches a lot of credit, the offense kept LSU off balance with a ton of runs up the middle, a solid O-line, and Andre' Woodson. Woodson is the new Heisman front runner , which makes next week's game a Heisman Showdown(this years winner vs. Next years). So whats a Gator to think of this...
What this means for Gators:
I don't really know. We have to go to Lexington and do what the #1 team couldn't. Thank goodness we've had a week to prepare, and maybe UK will suffer the same or an even worse hangover than LSU had. Fact is They're Good, there's no denying it now. My words from two days ago go nicely with a side of asparagus and light sauvignon blanc. We can forget that game in Columbia right now, cause this one is just as tough. Using the transitive win/loss theory, and the fact that Vegas gives a 3 point edge to the home team, then:
LSU28 - UF24 =means LSU=UF+1 and LSU40(could have scored FG) - UK43 means LSU=UK then UK=UF+1 and thats not good.
but if home field is worth 5 then LSU=UF-1 and LSU=UK+1 then UF=UK +2
So UK>LSU>UF>UK makes no sense,
but this does - LSU>S.Caro.>UK>LSU
And all that means LSU=UK=S.Caro.=(hopefully)UF
Understand?
Cal blows it - Just when the #1 ranking was in sight they go and do the dumbest thing possible. Where to begin with the stupidity? The poor QB not throwing it away - Not saving a TimeOut - Starting this Freshman QB, when Longshore is walk the sidelines on his "hurt" ankle - DeSean Jackson's primadonna "ow I'm hurt" while we're losing and "I haven't made any big plays" Act. Whatever. They are still in it, cause everyone is gonna lose.
Oregon State may be my new favorite "other" team. The last few years they've knocked off Cal, USC, Cal, and Notre Dame . They'll never play the Gators. They're the Beavers. Whats not to Love?
Ohio State? Really? can someone please start a campaign to get USF the #1 ranking. Why is OSU any better? really, why? A win @ Washington? is that impressive? the rest of their wins are as follows: Kent State, Akron, Youngstown State, Northwestern, Minnesota, Purdue. That qualifies as a #1 team? That sounds like a resume for the Emerald city Bowl. The only teams on that list better than UCF are Purdue and Washington. and UCF just lost by 52 points to USF. Lucky for us, OSU has to finish the season against the five best teams in the Big Ten: Mich st., Penn State, Wisconsin, Illinois, Michigan. However, its unlucky that all five of those teams have horrible problems and aren't very good. So heres my new #1:
USF is #1 - Heres my case: They're undefeated, a true accomplishment this season. They have two quality wins - @Auburn and vs. West Virginia. And... well... look who they're up against. The only other teams with a claim this week are OSU and BC. I've already covered OSU's lame resume, and BC's isn't any better. They've beaten Wake Forest and GaTech.... and.. yeah, thats it. Also they struggled with a D-1AA school in Umass and gave up 14 points to ND. USF also has the best shot at finishing Undefeated. Games left: @Rutgers, @Uconn, Cincy, and Louisville. When will they lose? (I know, I know, everyone will lose)
All One Losses - What this means is no one will be Undefeated. NO ONE. This will be the story for the next couple of weeks. All about how this will create udder chaos and arguing over who the two best one loss teams will be. But really, this nearly happens every year. Just last year, we were one OSU loss from it happening. One loss teams almost always have a shot at the title. So we should be fine, two one loss teams will emerge and we'll all be happy, Unless...
Just One One-loser, and many Two-losers -
Unless, they're aren't any ONE loss teams left. At this rate, only two or three teams will be left with One loss, so maybe there won't be an argument (ha) Or what I'm getting at, maybe a two loss team is the second best team at the end of it? Crazy you say? Look at this:
Heres what the top ten should look like on Monday:
1USF - Best 6-0 team thus far
2OSU - worst 6-0 opponents, worse than Kansas
3BC - somehow still undefeated, see ya in Blacksburg
4OU - back on track
5Oregon - looking very good
6LSU - one close hangover loss
7S. Carolina - only loss in Death Valley
8Kentucky - Great this week, not so much last week
9W. Virginia - Best looking Loss, but no quality wins
10VaTech - Looking better every week, only L @LSU
11Arizona State - not sure why no respect?
12Cal - Dumbest Loss of year
13USC - Worst looking one loss team
and then at #14 sit our fist 2 loss team - UF
15 Kansas -still not buying 6-0
By the end of the year these have to happen- Cal/USC/Oregon/ASU play five times=five losses. VaTech/BC play once, and then the ACC championship, so maybe twice. Kentuck/S. Carolina will have to play LSU in Atlanta and both have to play the Gators. OU has to play 6 more games, including their championship.
These Probably will happen: USF falls to Rutgers/Cincy/Louisville. Only one of Cal/USC/Oregon/ASU gets away with One loss. All SEC East teams have two losses.
Heres the likelyhood of every team finishing with two losses:
SEC - LSU with one loss plays a two loss team that Did beat them or nearly beat them on the road. LSU loses: 65% chance of happening
PAC-10 - the foursome (ASU/Cal/USC/Oregon) plays five games against each other. ASU/USC have 3 games each, so no way for them. Cal/Oregon will have to go 2-0 against USC/ASU. All have two losses: 50% chance of happening
Big East: USF and W. Virginia lose. Games vs. Rutgers/Cincy/Louisville remain for both: 75%
Big 12: OU loses again. anytime: 70% - maybe 80% this year
ACC: VaTech plays BC twice and one other upset leads to both having 2 losses: 99%
Big Ten: OSU loses twice vs. 5 teams that are better than any they've faced thusfar: 50%
None of that is ridiculous to believe in a normal year, and none of it would even be a "huge" upset like we've seen so many times this year. At his point the most unlikely thing to happen is OSU lose twice and the PAC-10 foursome all lose twice (even though there are still 5 losses guaranteed to happen to them). And if one of those scenarios doesn't play out, it doesn't matter, because two of them have to not play out for there to be a clear cut #1vs#2. So what if it all happens? What then? We'll be left with a group of two loss teams and maybe one One loss team and then it will become impossible to pick out the two. and Don't forget Hawaii either, who actually has the best shot at undefeated. The computers will put them ahead of a two loss team, despite not winning any credible games.
This scenario is the chaos that has to finish this chaotic season.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Games of the Week: Bye Week
Well its bye-week for the Gators, that means its time to go fishing.
The Schedule looks a little weak this week. But we said that before, and then 5 of the top ten went down. So we don't say that any more. In fact, going by averages this season, 3 of the Top 10 should lose every Saturday. Here's the list of the most likely to be upset to the least likely: Oklahoma, USF, Cal, LSU, USC, the other USC, Oregon, BC, Ohio State, W. Virginia
5 USF vs. UCF 12:00
This is a rivalry game. A year ago, this was a big game for both teams, one that could have gone either way. USF clearly has the advantage, but thats meaningless this year. Every year, you can throw out the stats for rivalries and the upset bug thats going around means you can throw them out for any game. Also, People outside of I-4 don't know how big this rivalry is. These teams hate each other. And if you think regular fans are scoffing at the #5 ranking, ask someone at UCF what they think of it, they might spit on you, or they'll ask you "whats college football? .... are you holding man?" These two teams are like two sisters in middle school, the older one (UCF, been around since '79) is jealous that the younger one (USF, 11 yrs old) has bigger boobs (a #5 ranking) has had more boyfriends (2 bowl games vs. 1) is part of a cooler clique(Big East vs C-USA)and might go to the prom (BCS bowl) and get banged by the backup kicker.(... this guy?)
1 LSU at 17 Kentucky 3:30
Let down game. Thats what you'll hear about it, whatever "let down game" means. Fact is, this is still Kentucky, and that ranking next to their name is meaningless. I was waiting till that game last week against south carolina to make judgment and here it is: Kentucky is Kentucky. See you guys in March. LSU rolls
7 South Carolina at UNC 3:30
A head coaching re-match of the 2000 Sugar Bowl, only with weaker teams, dumber mascots, way less offense, and two states caring instead of one, wait this just in, today is midnight madness, North Carolina no longer cares. (Its also a rematch of the fantastic Browns-Redskins game in 2002) UNC is coming off a big win against Miami, and probably think they have a shot here. They shouldn't, but this is 2007 and anyone can win anywhere. Time to buy a new shirt
11 Missouri at 6 Oklahoma 6:30
This is the popular upset pick. Mizzou has looked good so far, but I think they do this every year, hold on let me check..... yep , here it is: 6-0 2006, 5-2 2005, 4-1 2004, 4-0 2003 and never once did they win more than 8 games. Oklahoma wins big
22 Auburn at Arkansas 7:45
Can't wait to see which Brandon Cox shows up in Fayetteville. The one who hands touchdown flavored presents to a Miss St. defense or the one who owns Florida("owns" is used loosly here, as in one who makes few mistakes while D and special teams hands you W's). - Someone told me he has a disease that makes him do this, Some sort of permanent Mono / lazy ass syndrome where he plays better at certain times of the day? Someone substantiate this for me. Show me Auburn stats at a night game/noon game split. This one is at 7:45, thats the same as the UF/AU game, Auburn wins behind the stellar play of Dr. Jekyll
FSU loses to Wake again!
Oh they joy I feel. - This is what those jerks get for ranking the noles. Can you believe they tried to put them in the 25? I was about to do a post yesterday chronicling the lamest 4-1 record in college football, but I just didn't have time( ha, just kidding, I have all the time in the world, I just didn't want to depress myself). Hey Nole fans, you just lost to a team that lost to Nebraska, and no, I don't expect you to understand why that sucks, because you still live in a delusional 1994 reality.
The Schedule looks a little weak this week. But we said that before, and then 5 of the top ten went down. So we don't say that any more. In fact, going by averages this season, 3 of the Top 10 should lose every Saturday. Here's the list of the most likely to be upset to the least likely: Oklahoma, USF, Cal, LSU, USC, the other USC, Oregon, BC, Ohio State, W. Virginia
5 USF vs. UCF 12:00
This is a rivalry game. A year ago, this was a big game for both teams, one that could have gone either way. USF clearly has the advantage, but thats meaningless this year. Every year, you can throw out the stats for rivalries and the upset bug thats going around means you can throw them out for any game. Also, People outside of I-4 don't know how big this rivalry is. These teams hate each other. And if you think regular fans are scoffing at the #5 ranking, ask someone at UCF what they think of it, they might spit on you, or they'll ask you "whats college football? .... are you holding man?" These two teams are like two sisters in middle school, the older one (UCF, been around since '79) is jealous that the younger one (USF, 11 yrs old) has bigger boobs (a #5 ranking) has had more boyfriends (2 bowl games vs. 1) is part of a cooler clique(Big East vs C-USA)and might go to the prom (BCS bowl) and get banged by the backup kicker.(... this guy?)
1 LSU at 17 Kentucky 3:30
Let down game. Thats what you'll hear about it, whatever "let down game" means. Fact is, this is still Kentucky, and that ranking next to their name is meaningless. I was waiting till that game last week against south carolina to make judgment and here it is: Kentucky is Kentucky. See you guys in March. LSU rolls
7 South Carolina at UNC 3:30
A head coaching re-match of the 2000 Sugar Bowl, only with weaker teams, dumber mascots, way less offense, and two states caring instead of one, wait this just in, today is midnight madness, North Carolina no longer cares. (Its also a rematch of the fantastic Browns-Redskins game in 2002) UNC is coming off a big win against Miami, and probably think they have a shot here. They shouldn't, but this is 2007 and anyone can win anywhere. Time to buy a new shirt
11 Missouri at 6 Oklahoma 6:30
This is the popular upset pick. Mizzou has looked good so far, but I think they do this every year, hold on let me check..... yep , here it is: 6-0 2006, 5-2 2005, 4-1 2004, 4-0 2003 and never once did they win more than 8 games. Oklahoma wins big
22 Auburn at Arkansas 7:45
Can't wait to see which Brandon Cox shows up in Fayetteville. The one who hands touchdown flavored presents to a Miss St. defense or the one who owns Florida("owns" is used loosly here, as in one who makes few mistakes while D and special teams hands you W's). - Someone told me he has a disease that makes him do this, Some sort of permanent Mono / lazy ass syndrome where he plays better at certain times of the day? Someone substantiate this for me. Show me Auburn stats at a night game/noon game split. This one is at 7:45, thats the same as the UF/AU game, Auburn wins behind the stellar play of Dr. Jekyll
FSU loses to Wake again!
Oh they joy I feel. - This is what those jerks get for ranking the noles. Can you believe they tried to put them in the 25? I was about to do a post yesterday chronicling the lamest 4-1 record in college football, but I just didn't have time( ha, just kidding, I have all the time in the world, I just didn't want to depress myself). Hey Nole fans, you just lost to a team that lost to Nebraska, and no, I don't expect you to understand why that sucks, because you still live in a delusional 1994 reality.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
The Sandwich has a Mascot
The Official mascot of the Gator Sandwich: This Guy
Thanks Molly for the link
Thanks Molly for the link
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
More Notes
LSU has the worst tunes -Everywhere you went, bad music would follow. Between this and the mind numbing "Tiger Bait" onslaught, It was like an assualt on my ears Saturday. Even at the AGR house, usually a bastion of southern tradition, the ag boys insisted we "shake it like a polaroid" and "Superman that Ho." You couldn't walk 30 feet without another stack of pawn shop speaker blasting top 40 rap music, techno house music, or some weird cajun singing along with Clarence Carter's "Strokin'". Check out the proof Here, and Here, and Here.
Speaking of bad music
Matt Grothe has a theme song - G to the R O T H E written and performed by the worst kicker in the top 25 - Delbert Alvarado
Don't mess with our Safeties - UF fans protect their players through the magic of death threats
Three Cheers for Stanford - Hip Hip Harbaugh!! - Also, how does Mich drop out of the 25 for losing to App St., but USC losing to 41 point underdog Stanford result in a #10 ranking? App St. would beat Stanford like 8 out of 10 times. Whatever, USC sucks
Heres Video of the LSU response to the USC score
Rock Chalk Jayhawk - perennial doormat Kansas is now 5-0 and #20 in the country. They're also the #4 ranked funniest teams in the country. This is their coach. This is how their coach talks, and This is how they celebrate a win. You might remember Mangino as the coach who accused Big 12 officials of fixing games to guarantee BCS bowl appearances. Kansas: let mirth reign
Gator fans can RIP - for those of you looking for a great place to spend eternity, Florida Field is as good as any. You won't be alone either cause - "It's really a hot thing right now", and isn't that the best way to decide, When I die, just do with my remains whatever is "hot" at the moment. I do agree with this guy though- "I think my body goes to Florida Field, (and) my soul goes to Steve Spurrier's house," he said. For those considering, just remember that one day we could hire another Zook, and fans of opposing teams like to pee on it.
Friday Night Lights has jumped the shark. And by "jumped" I mean "dropped", and by "the shark" I mean "a dead body into a river." Just days after I recommended watching it, I'm now selling FNL stock as quick as I can.
Yes, Corso is a turtle - Here he is doin the Soulja Boy
Speaking of bad music
Matt Grothe has a theme song - G to the R O T H E written and performed by the worst kicker in the top 25 - Delbert Alvarado
Don't mess with our Safeties - UF fans protect their players through the magic of death threats
Three Cheers for Stanford - Hip Hip Harbaugh!! - Also, how does Mich drop out of the 25 for losing to App St., but USC losing to 41 point underdog Stanford result in a #10 ranking? App St. would beat Stanford like 8 out of 10 times. Whatever, USC sucks
Heres Video of the LSU response to the USC score
Rock Chalk Jayhawk - perennial doormat Kansas is now 5-0 and #20 in the country. They're also the #4 ranked funniest teams in the country. This is their coach. This is how their coach talks, and This is how they celebrate a win. You might remember Mangino as the coach who accused Big 12 officials of fixing games to guarantee BCS bowl appearances. Kansas: let mirth reign
Gator fans can RIP - for those of you looking for a great place to spend eternity, Florida Field is as good as any. You won't be alone either cause - "It's really a hot thing right now", and isn't that the best way to decide, When I die, just do with my remains whatever is "hot" at the moment. I do agree with this guy though- "I think my body goes to Florida Field, (and) my soul goes to Steve Spurrier's house," he said. For those considering, just remember that one day we could hire another Zook, and fans of opposing teams like to pee on it.
Friday Night Lights has jumped the shark. And by "jumped" I mean "dropped", and by "the shark" I mean "a dead body into a river." Just days after I recommended watching it, I'm now selling FNL stock as quick as I can.
Yes, Corso is a turtle - Here he is doin the Soulja Boy
Sunday, October 7, 2007
the LSU notebook
I could recap the game for you, but thats not what you're here for, and it would depress me. You're here for a few laughs and some inside info on why college football is the greatest thing on earth(that constantly rips your heart out, sets it on fire, rubs salt on it, and places it back in your chest). So this week we're starting something new, "the Weekend Notebook". I've kept a notebook* full of quality jokes and minutia that you're just dying to know about but don't really need to know, but by the end of this post you will know, and once that happens, there is no taking it back. I'm in your head whether you like it or not. So, without further ado...
-LSU fans are baby kittens!! Thats right folks, lovable, cute baby kittens. The nicest bunch of fans I've been around since... well since last week with the Auburn fans (sans CJ). The rumors of Baton Rouge horrors were greatly exaggerated. I had such a good time this weekend, until 11:30 sat. of course, that I think this should be a bi-annual event. So join me in 2009, for LSU week, I guarantee a good time.
-T-shirts of the Weekend- the following shirts were seen around LSU, in order, lamest to funniest
1."T-bag Tebow" this one was a nice attempt to make Tebow seem gay through alliteration. However, due to improper grammar, the point was lost when determining who was doing the "t-bagging." Was it the person wearing the shirt? The LSU defense? Les Miles? If it was Tebow, then the shirt should have read, "Tebow T-bags" giving the verb possessive to Tebow instead of the unidentified article. These shirts were widely popular despite this obvious flaw.
2."Miles to Michigan" Nothing like home fans eagerly awaiting the departure of the coach of the #1 ranked, undefeated Tigers.
3."Nick Saban is a Douche" blunt and to the point. I like. but this brings up the issue of how acceptable is the word "Douche"? Would it get bleeped on TV? Would you say it with your Mom in the room? Is it popular enough that I no longer need to look up how to spell it?
4."Taze the Gators, Bro" original, timely, nailed the punchline "Bro", just a great shirt.
-The announcement of the USC score. during the third quarter, the PA announcer told the crowd that USC had lost to Stanford, this brought about a big cheer from the LSU fans, who now knew they would stand alone at #1, as long as they won. This was interesting for a few reasons:
1. This was one of the loudest, if not the Loudest cheer of the night. While it did follow an LSU score, the Tigers were still down 3 points. Shouldn't the crowd act just a little nervous?
2. Despite the loudest cheering of the night, Tebow and the Gators went on a 5 play, 75 yard drive to shut up the Tiger fans. By far the easiest drive of the night. Which was probably a result of:
3:As crazy as the fans celebrated, the Tiger bench celebrated even more. The players were jumping around and cheering and waving towels. This seems like a total overreaction for a team in the middle of a dog fight (hey, do we have to stop using this analogy? just cause Vick did it? or is the fact that it's already a war term for a plane fight going to save it from the PC universe?) Shouldn't Miles and the rest of the coaches remind the Tigers that the rankings don't matter and winning this game, that they were currently losing, is way more important? This would be a much bigger story line if the Gators hadn't collapsed, but we did.
-What were the LSU students chanting? I want answers people. Apparently it involved Tebow and swear words. I'm just surprised LSU fans can chant anything other than "Tiger Bait"
-"Tiger Bait" - The LSU fans officially own this phrase. I've never been yelled at the same way so many times in my life. Its worse than UGA fans and "Gators wear Jean Shorts". I move to stop using "Gator Bait" or any other bait type cheer altogether. They've killed it. It hit rock bottom, when I was called "Tiger Bait" by a four year old as he slapped my shin with gold and purple beads. By the end of the day, it had lost all meaning, It just became a part of their vocabulary, and stood for anything and everything, I think they were having entire conversations with just the words "tiger bait", it was like a Cajun Jibberish that meant more than we knew. Our only response:
"Corndogs" - yes the legend of the Corndog is deeply rooted in LSU lore. Actually its not, Its all spelled out here. But man do they hate hearing about corndogs. I for one, love corndogs and consider an association with any fried food a compliment. But not the Tigers. They hate it, those corndog smellin Tigers, they really hate it. For the record, leaving the stadium I was sure I smelled the thick stench of corndogs. But it turned out to be just a mix of day-old steamed seafood and Urine.
-The worst fan I met all weekend had the seat directly behind me. He was a 20 year-old D-bag from the heart of Baton Rouge. His biggest flaw? a complete lack of yelling etiquette. You know when you yell at a game you make a nice "Oooooo" sound. Loud, yet soothing. Well, not this guy, the sound he made was more like that noise you make at the doctor when he sticks a tongue depressor down your throat, only a thousand times louder. And he would do it over and over. "Weeeghlglhgghg" "Wgeegehheeehellleh" "Weeeelgglgleehehlelhelhghghlehelpaodihfel" As if he was choking on a 10 point third quarter deficit or something.
-I blame Lou Holtz - His pep talks are now 1-5 on the season
*Notebook may not actually exist
-LSU fans are baby kittens!! Thats right folks, lovable, cute baby kittens. The nicest bunch of fans I've been around since... well since last week with the Auburn fans (sans CJ). The rumors of Baton Rouge horrors were greatly exaggerated. I had such a good time this weekend, until 11:30 sat. of course, that I think this should be a bi-annual event. So join me in 2009, for LSU week, I guarantee a good time.
-T-shirts of the Weekend- the following shirts were seen around LSU, in order, lamest to funniest
1."T-bag Tebow" this one was a nice attempt to make Tebow seem gay through alliteration. However, due to improper grammar, the point was lost when determining who was doing the "t-bagging." Was it the person wearing the shirt? The LSU defense? Les Miles? If it was Tebow, then the shirt should have read, "Tebow T-bags" giving the verb possessive to Tebow instead of the unidentified article. These shirts were widely popular despite this obvious flaw.
2."Miles to Michigan" Nothing like home fans eagerly awaiting the departure of the coach of the #1 ranked, undefeated Tigers.
3."Nick Saban is a Douche" blunt and to the point. I like. but this brings up the issue of how acceptable is the word "Douche"? Would it get bleeped on TV? Would you say it with your Mom in the room? Is it popular enough that I no longer need to look up how to spell it?
4."Taze the Gators, Bro" original, timely, nailed the punchline "Bro", just a great shirt.
-The announcement of the USC score. during the third quarter, the PA announcer told the crowd that USC had lost to Stanford, this brought about a big cheer from the LSU fans, who now knew they would stand alone at #1, as long as they won. This was interesting for a few reasons:
1. This was one of the loudest, if not the Loudest cheer of the night. While it did follow an LSU score, the Tigers were still down 3 points. Shouldn't the crowd act just a little nervous?
2. Despite the loudest cheering of the night, Tebow and the Gators went on a 5 play, 75 yard drive to shut up the Tiger fans. By far the easiest drive of the night. Which was probably a result of:
3:As crazy as the fans celebrated, the Tiger bench celebrated even more. The players were jumping around and cheering and waving towels. This seems like a total overreaction for a team in the middle of a dog fight (hey, do we have to stop using this analogy? just cause Vick did it? or is the fact that it's already a war term for a plane fight going to save it from the PC universe?) Shouldn't Miles and the rest of the coaches remind the Tigers that the rankings don't matter and winning this game, that they were currently losing, is way more important? This would be a much bigger story line if the Gators hadn't collapsed, but we did.
-What were the LSU students chanting? I want answers people. Apparently it involved Tebow and swear words. I'm just surprised LSU fans can chant anything other than "Tiger Bait"
-"Tiger Bait" - The LSU fans officially own this phrase. I've never been yelled at the same way so many times in my life. Its worse than UGA fans and "Gators wear Jean Shorts". I move to stop using "Gator Bait" or any other bait type cheer altogether. They've killed it. It hit rock bottom, when I was called "Tiger Bait" by a four year old as he slapped my shin with gold and purple beads. By the end of the day, it had lost all meaning, It just became a part of their vocabulary, and stood for anything and everything, I think they were having entire conversations with just the words "tiger bait", it was like a Cajun Jibberish that meant more than we knew. Our only response:
"Corndogs" - yes the legend of the Corndog is deeply rooted in LSU lore. Actually its not, Its all spelled out here. But man do they hate hearing about corndogs. I for one, love corndogs and consider an association with any fried food a compliment. But not the Tigers. They hate it, those corndog smellin Tigers, they really hate it. For the record, leaving the stadium I was sure I smelled the thick stench of corndogs. But it turned out to be just a mix of day-old steamed seafood and Urine.
-The worst fan I met all weekend had the seat directly behind me. He was a 20 year-old D-bag from the heart of Baton Rouge. His biggest flaw? a complete lack of yelling etiquette. You know when you yell at a game you make a nice "Oooooo" sound. Loud, yet soothing. Well, not this guy, the sound he made was more like that noise you make at the doctor when he sticks a tongue depressor down your throat, only a thousand times louder. And he would do it over and over. "Weeeghlglhgghg" "Wgeegehheeehellleh" "Weeeelgglgleehehlelhelhghghlehelpaodihfel" As if he was choking on a 10 point third quarter deficit or something.
-I blame Lou Holtz - His pep talks are now 1-5 on the season
*Notebook may not actually exist
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Games of the Week: Prayer Week
If you're looking for the games of the week, check this out
If you're looking for predictions, I predict: Bad
If you're looking for hope, I just hope it doesn't rain
If you're looking for Tony Joiner, check the impound lot, I mean sideline
If you're looking for laughs, watch the Office
If you're looking for me, I'll be in Baton Rouge. hangin with this guy. (whats worse, freshly sharpened blades, or rusty dull ones?)
Me and Timmy have been prayin hard lately, and after the ominous start to the week, we're gonna need some help. Hope God smiles on this Gator.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Monday Fallout - the rapid descent
Hi Earth, hows it going?.... I know its been awhile huh?..... Yeah I know... Well we've been busy, enjoying the upper atmosphere.... Right, Like Icarus, I get it, but thats what happens when you win 19 of 20 football games, 68 fo 79 Basketball games, Three SEC titles, and Three National Titles. You forget.... Ok, you're right, we'll keep em firmly on the ground from now on.
Yeah it stings. Its like the day Superman discovered Kryptonite, or when Darryl Strawberry first did crack. Yes, the Gators have a weakness too, ours is called Auburn. I won't dwell on the game long, we had a horrible first half, and came up a few plays short in the second. For those looking for an excuse for the lame offensive showing, I think I found a good one. But this just isn't supposed to happen at home, and the crowd was really a force. However, this is a young team, really young, in fact the youngest, dead last in experience in the NCAA according to Phil Steele. The future looks bleak too, If Auburn can get us than almost anyone can, forget this weekend, I'm worried about Kentucky, South Carolina, Georgia, and FSU... OK, UGA and FSU don't look that bad (One never beats us, and the other is starting a QB who cant read, I don't mean can't read defenses, I mean cant read books). But it is just one loss. Something most teams experience often, Gator fans just aren't used to it lately. Realistically, I never thought we had a chance at the big one this year, but the SEC was attainable, and still is, even with another loss to LSU. We're one year away, we need to take a few lumps, and thats ok with me. I just hate that it was Auburn again, why couldn't it be something like a speeding train, that'd make way more sense than Krytonite (LSU is the speeding train, for those following the analogy, and Auburn is a glowing green rock)
Tony Joiner is taking his car back- Tony Joiner was arrested this week stealing his girlfriends car back from the towing company. This is not the kind of lumps I was talking about. However, I stand by Tony and his vigilante ways. Hes no criminal, did you read that he was stopped while trying to close the gate behind him? Thats just being polite. I say Take Em' to court Tony, no jury in Gainesville could convict you. The towing service in Gainesville is the lowest form of humanity. If you want to arrest someone for stealing, arrest those jerks at Watson's Towing. The go out every night and steal dozens of cars and charge $76 to give em back. Also, They should have known, This is the second warning our DB's have given this year, remember Dorian Munroe? He ripped a police boot off his car with his bare hands, fight the power guys - Nobody messes with our hoopties - I heard Tony was seen leaving the jailhouse this morning driving 12 mph in the slow lane, allowing multiple people to pass on him. Seriouly though, this will receive a ton of attention, and I don't blame Joiner at all. anyone who's dealt with these towing jerks knows what its like. It was his own car, he just walked into a parking lot and drove off, how is this any worse than what those tow trucks do? He shouldn't be charged, shouldn't be suspended, and should be applauded for standing up to a lame ass system that the local businesses and Gainesville government perpetuate.On to more positive notes.
South Florida, King for a day- Or week, or month. I stand corrected, at the moment someone looks to be the "best" team in Florida. The wildest game I've ever witnessed went down Friday night in Tampa. Ten Turnovers?!?!? Seriously, for a team as good as West Virginia to have six is so amazing it can't be some fluke. South Florida's Defense has forced 15 turnovers in the last three games, thats definitely no fluke. The staff at USF must have some fumble inducing tackling practice, or Int class or something. And it was a pretty balance effort. While the Offense is certainly no juggernaut, they still make the plays to win games, like Grothe's ridiculous spin to avoid pressure and launch a 50 yrd pass downfield for the TD. The stats don't show how much USF dominated this game. West Virginia rang up some yards, but I'm telling you, they never had a chance. The worst performance by the Bulls was their attempt to storm the field, it took the student at least 5 minutes to figure out they were allowed and then fall from the stands one at a time, but well forgive em, They've never done this before. And this win couldn't be at a better time, with upset saturday, the Bulls jumped all the way to #6 in the polls. Congrats to Coach Leavitt and the Bulls, this has to feel really good for a guy who started the program from nothing and even washed the uniforms early on.Big Bunch of Losers - At least the Gators weren't alone. Welcome to the pity party Sooners, Longhorns, Mountaineers, Nittany Lions, Scarlett Knights, Ducks, Tiders, Obama, Mets, Chargers, Padres, Isiah, and Britney
Top Ten in Disarray - Thanks to the multiple upsets the Top Ten is at an all-time ridiculously off-base point. This happens almost every year at this time, when some mediocre teams make it far too long without a loss (I'm looking at you Wisconsin, Boston College, and Kentucky). But this weeks is much worse than usual. I know the pollsters have to vote on whats happened, but if half of these teams are still there at the end of the year, or a month from now even, I'll be surprised. For the record, those five teams are Wisconsin, Boston College, Kentucky, Ohio State(not out of the ten, just not #4), and a certain team from Florida- not the one you'd expect either.
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